Joy Go With Happy

 

Shit happens. Some times it keeps happening. As a Dad, sometimes it seemed it was literally happening all the time.

Nobody ever told me the first few years of the joys of fatherhood would smell like my children’s dirty diapers.

Diapers? Size what? Boys? Girls? Pull ups. Holy shit! That came out of my kid?? I still laugh about all the times juggling kids and all their ins and outs. We laugh about it now. They were great times. Hellllllllla smelly. But great times 😊

It’s kind of a metaphor for life at times; where our happiest times can be punctuated by periods of absolute, incomprehensible, and seemingly endless crap.

Sometimes it seems to pile on. Jobs. Relationships. Family bs. Friends. Commuting. Bills. More bills. Still more bills. Uninvited drama…..At times, it just doesn’t seem to end. It’s tough to keep positive when shit keeps flying at you. Even when it isn’t literally the case.

I have been asked how I keep calm in stressful situations. First, I must admit sometimes appearances can be deceiving. The appearance of calm often masked a state of immensely stressful vibration so intense it’s only appearance could be perceived at stillness.

As times evolve, the realization no matter how stressed we are, it will pass – creeps in more and more to consciousness. After a while, it becomes second nature to simply roll with things.

After all, we can’t control everything and I, for one, have long since accepted this as my most effective stress management tool.

So….

My choice is to try my best to “go with happy“.

When things are bad, try and find the good. The happy. Try and make someone’s world a little better. Like my friend Brian and his wife Barbara and daughter Gemma do so selflessly; volunteer and make the world a better place. Show your kids the gift of giving. Show them your “happy” and you’re happy.

Take someone’s picture when they’re struggling for a selfie with their family (a personal favorite). Give directions (another favorite) and just stop and find the good. Make someone’s day just a tiny bit better with an act of kindness. The gift you give gives back.

Wake up and choose happy. Put tomorrow behind you. I know it’s not easy. Damn, sometimes it’s as if the universe conspires to mess with you. A cascade of seemingly unfairly aligned circularances can test the most well intentioned person. It has been the case for me and I suspect many of you as well.

But those are the times to push through. To rise above the easy slide towards “oh shit, seriously?!?!”. It’s when these situations are overcome or at least dealt with and moved on from…we see the pattern of influencing our own mindset and the way we live.

So as you look at the day. The last week. Last months or years. Know this… They’re all in the past. Your now is here. Embrace it. Your future is waiting for you to create it. Go for it!

And if you fail. So what. You know enough about life to know it will nearly always be ok. The times we fret about things is immeasurably more numerous compared to the times worry was warranted. 

And for those times positivity won’t erase the hurt, I have a couple of theories.

First, about the people we have lost. Those special people we love most who hurt or have died. Those people, I really believe in my heart, want you to be happy. I feel it’s the best way to honor them. To love the gift of life we are living right now. That is what we would want for them isn’t it? If the roles were reversed? I believe so.

And for the events in life where consequences are inescapable and you have to deal with things you couldn’t ever have imagined? I have a theory about that also. Pretty simple really.. Deal with it and don’t let it define you. It happened. It sucks. You messed up big time. BIG TIME. Move forward. Do you want that to define you and who you are and will be? No way right ? So don’t.

So… I believe we should go with happy. 

 



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